Tuesday, May 27, 2008

T-minus 3 more days.....

3 more days of this week and then - dun dun duuuuuunnn --- I have to go back to work. I start back on Monday which still seems IMPOSSIBLE. It seems impossible that I have an almost 3 month old baby. It seems impossible that I will be physically able to leave my baby with strangers for 8 hours a day 5 days a week. It seems impossible that I will be able to do this whole thing without being TOTALLY un-stoked. SO I guess I will just do what I have to in order to get through it... It has to get better with time!

It really hit home today when we stopped by the Daycare Center to go over all the details and to get her acquainted with the teachers. It was nice to see everything again, but it's funny how now that I actually have a real baby and not just a "baby" in my belly - NOTHING is good enough. I want to bring her toys and blankets and everything she will need so she won't have to use stuff all these other kids play with... But that is crazy talk and I know I will get over it soon enough. I know that she will have fun playing with kids and everyone there seemed very happy...

I had all these things I wanted to do before my time off was over and it always seemed like I had 4 more weeks - but here were are - 3 days away and I have a TON of stuff to finish! I started a Baby Photo book that I wanted to have up to date before I went to work so I could easily add to it as she grew. I am not even done with the Pregnancy photos - let alone the 400 shots we took of her first month of life!!!!

I also wanted to get all my planters done and the backyard looking great. I have managed to buy 2 planters, but there is nothing in them or the other 8 planters for that matter.

I wanted to have a rummage sale - but even if I didn't actually have the sale before I went back, I wanted to at least have everything ready - priced and organized. HA! I have 2 giant piles of stuff in the garage and what seems like no hope to ever get that one done. I guess we will have a big weekend project on our hands!

Other than those things - I really wanted to just feel like I did everything I could with Elliette. We have of course done the Shopping outings, Lunch with friends and walks in the parks - but I guess I just wanted to feel like I had exhausted every last moment of this leave so I didn't regret anything. But here we are and I wish I had 3 more months to spend watching her learn and seeing her change every day. She is just becoming such a little person with a fun little personality to go with it. I love her to pieces and I hate to feel like I am missing anything.

I know I am making the right decision to go back to work, it's just going to be a huge adjustment - emotionally and physically. I have really been in an alter state of my life that is NOTHING like it was before. And now, I have to return to the old life but with a baby! It will be good to get back into a rhythm of getting up and going to work and learning how to get Elliette to the Daycare and me to work on time. I am sure the first few weeks will be interesting!

Other than all these emotions I am feeling - I LOVE being a Mom to such an amazing baby girl. She is my everything and I can't imagine not having her. What a gift she is to her Dad and I. We LOVE LOVE LOVE her!

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Elliette - Month Two

Dearest Elliette –

Okay, we are at 2 months here and I am ready for you to stop getting so big already! The time is flying by and I can’t even start to prepare for the fact that in 3 more weeks – I have to go back to work and leave you in someone else’s care. I will admit that staying home with you for the last 2 months has been challenging, but seeing you change and grow has been amazing. I am still trying to figure you out. You are a tough cookie to crack as you change up on me daily!

You are still the center of our universe and your Daddy and I can’t wait until the next milestone. I however am starting to see what everyone kept on warning me about – how fast you GROW! All of your clothes that are 0-3 fit perfectly so I am having a blast getting you ready in the morning. So many cute clothes! I actually had to put away all the newborn sized onsies and a few pajamas. That was a bit sad for me - I think back to you at 3 weeks old and it seems like yesterday, but you are so much more grown up now. You have a little personality. You know what you like and you definitely know what you DON’T like!

Speaking of what you DON’T like – you sure hate sleeping during the day! I just figured babies sleep during the day when they are tired – but not you! You are super hard to get to sleep and then getting you to STAY sleeping if I happen to trick you into falling asleep is impossible. It is the most trying part of our day when Daddy is at work. Sometimes I feel like all I do is try to get you to take a nap all day. I have tried putting you to sleep in your bassinet, in your pack and play, in a swaddle, in the swing. I have pulled your black out curtains tight so there is no light, and I added a fan for noise. I have tried you on your side, on your back, and even on your tummy, but I can’t seem to get more than 20 minutes of a nap out of you. I am hoping this “phase” will end soon so you can get the amount of sleep you need!

As much as I complain about your sleeping patterns during the day, we could not be luckier when it comes to nighttime. You are an AMAZING baby from the hours of 9pm – 6am because you sleep THE WHOLE WAY THROUGH. You do this pretty much every night and you have been doing this for about a month now. Like I said AMAZING. Everyone always told me to SLEEP NOW because once that baby is here you will never sleep again, but I think we only had like 3 weeks of bad sleepless nights. So THANK YOU from the bottom our hearts… You Daddy and I TRULY appreciate it. So please don’t go changing that up on us!

You took your first trip this month to South Dakota to meet all of my family. Your Namba (which is what we are currently calling my Mom) threw you a wonderful party complete with a cake and slushy drinks. You were finally able to meet all those relatives we don’t see very often since they live 4 hours away… You were a perfect little traveler. You slept the entire way to and from South Dakota as long as we would throw a pinky in your mouth every time you tried to wake up. You even slept well at night in the crib that Namba got for you. I was a VERY proud Momma to introduce such a special girl to my family.

The Highlights of Month Two:

- You coo and smile now ALL THE TIME. We can just look at you and you start to talk to us. I think you are trying to get a new noise out but it comes across more like a scream – I can’t wait to hear what that will turn into!
- You have begun holding your head up big time and you LOVE it! We tried out the Bebe Pod and you sat in that thing and thought you were the coolest baby in town holding your head up. It’s pretty cool to see you notice that you are able to do stuff like that and how proud you are of yourself.
- Your poop is no longer cute. It’s actually disgusting and it smells. Who knew such a sweet little baby girl could stink so much! Your Dad calls it the smell of wheatgrass even though neither one of us have any idea what that smell is. We just assume it’s bad. Kinda like your poopy diapers.
- You LOVE being naked – and LOVE taking baths because you can be naked. Let’s just be clear on something – being naked is cool and all, but this will have to be something that you grow out of okay?
- You still crave the pinky but we are now only using it for EXTREME SCREAMS and those are usually in the car. Your Daddy will sneak it in your mouth every once in a while because it’s like an off switch to your crying and he hates to hear you cry.
- You have begun to use your hands more and I have caught you checking them out a couple of times. I have noticed when you are feeding that you are constantly scratching at my breast with your tiny little fingers. You also grip my arm when I am rocking you to sleep. All of which is adorable.
- You are starting to chew on your hands when you can get them to your mouth, which is a great step towards self-soothing, the only downside is the amount of drool you can produce. We are talking some serious drool Miss Drooly McDroolerson!
- You still absolutely hate your car seat but it does NOT stop us from constantly putting you in it. I am hoping you will figure out that its just part of the deal and learn to like it. Maybe you will even fall asleep in it!!
- You love to play Patty Cake and I think I got a giggle out of you once when I was “rolling” the dough on your belly.
- We are going to attempt to take you camping at the end of this month. Outdoors camping with a baby…. I am scared but also excited to introduce you to something I LOVE!

Current Nicknames:
- Belly
- Bellisimo
- Missy
- Skeener
- Chunky Monkey
- Cheeks
- Lady
- Baby Girl
- Potato Muffin (this is Daddy’s new name for you)
- Punchkin (this is my new one for you)
- Sugar pie
- Peanut Butter and Jelliette
- Bells and Whistles
- Belgian or Belgian Waffle

I am so excited to watch you learn what the next cool new thing you can do. I know that someday you will not need me to help you learn things, but until then I will be here to hold your little hand through it all.